Going crazy, time to sketch...

I think it's just been too long since I've put pen or pencil to sketch paper or bristol board or rag paper or...anything! So, until I de-crazify, I think some sketching is in order. No agenda intended. Here's the first two minutes of my efforts (the 80s music station is playing in the background in the other room).

beige, surprisingly

I must be settling down, because a few weeks ago it was time to paint the walls of the new apartment, and I painted some of them beige, and I liked it.

Beige.

television...aggh!

I love television, sometimes.
Sometimes all I really need is a mindless hour in front of the tube (yes, I still have a tube - no LCD flat screens here).
But recently I've noticed how much more quickly time moves when I am watching television than when I am not.

I went for a walk in the park the other day. I walked several blocks to the edge of the park, walked deep into the park, and sat down on a bench to write for a bit. After writing for a short while, I took a look at the clock on my cell phone and noticed that only a half hour had passed since I'd left my apartment.
I was pleased to discover that, in the time it takes to watch a sitcom, I had gotten some exercise, enjoyed some nature, and written some words.
When I'm watching television, on the other hand, a whole hour can fall away in a moment with nothing at all to show for the time lost.

I think I might try watching television less and extending my life more.

Parsons rally

Today I took an hour off from work to participate in a rally at the New School University. (I took many photos of the rally on my cell phone, but I still have not acquired the necessary cable to connect my phone to my computer...so, no photos for the blog yet, unfortunately.)

I earned my MFA in Visual Arts at Parsons, a division of the New School, five years ago. This year has seen much upheaval at Parsons. The new chairperson, Coco Fusco, is extremely unpopular with the faculty, who feel greatly disrespected and often ignored by Ms. Fusco. Unrest in the department reached a climax just before Spring Break, when 12 faculty members, some who had been teaching at Parsons as many as 34 years, received notification via email that they would not be teaching their classes in the coming semester. The fact that this email was sent from Ms. Fusco did not help the situation.

I don't mean to put all the blame on Coco Fusco here. For all I know she is just a mouthpiece for the administration. The bigger targets seem to be New School President Bob Kerrey and the Parsons Dean and Provost, who seem to be on a mission to completely change the nature of the Fine Arts department by morphing it into a design and business oriented program. Parsons faculty, students, and alumni fear that, ultimately, an object-making curriculum, and the physical graduate studio spaces that go with it, will be done away with.

Part-time faculty Peter Drake (with whom I had a year-long course in my second year at Parsons) and Laurence Hegarty have spearheaded a lot of the faculty resistance effort. Their actions have been covered by several news sources, including the New York Times:

Parsons Faculty is Cut Amid Protests by Artists

The Parsons faculty has been having trouble with the New School administration ever since they first organized and secured a hard-won union for adjunct faculty (the lifeblood of most New School departments). See this 2004 Village Voice article as reference:

New School's Labor War

The hurdles these faculty have had to deal with seem extremely ridiculous when one considers that the New School was founded in the middle of the last century quite specifically as a liberal, progressive institution.

So, I've written emails to the New School administration as a concerned Parsons alumna, and I went to the rally outside the main administration building today.

The rally was energized, and also peaceful. Police put up barricades to control the flow of pedestrian traffic on the sidewalk around the rally, but there were zero altercations. Faculty and students just wanted their voices to be heard. I was so glad to be there, surrounded by my former classmates and teachers, among many others (the organizers estimated the turnout to be around 300+). Even in these troubling times at the New School, I found myself proud to be an alumna, because being a graduate of the Fine Arts program meant I was affiliated with that entire creative community - and today I was reminded how powerful it can feel to be a member of a community. I felt revved up, and inspired to create more.

I want to thank the organizers of the rally today for a wonderful event - I hope that today's rally, and continued action, leads to greater transparency in the New School administration and greater communication with the Parsons faculty.

This time tomorrow...

...Bush will not be our President.

:)

Saturn return

Alright. I'm not a new agey kinda gal, and I don't believe in astrology, but I swear there's something to this Saturn return thing.

My 30th birthday, which occurred earlier this year, was indeed a significant time for me, and I made sure to commemorate it properly, by surrounding myself with friends, preparing and performing a new full-length show, and getting my first tattoo.
I was looking forward to 30 as an age when I'd be done with all the bullshit, as a time when I'd focus on what I really wanted to do with my time.

Astrologers say that Saturn return occurs anywhere from age 27-30, or perhaps as specifically as every 29.5 years. This is how long it takes Saturn to complete its orbit around the sun - therefore, Saturn will theoretically occupy the same place in space on the day you turn 29.5 as it did on the day you were born.
According the Astropalmistry(!) website, "Saturn is the planet of contraction, limitation and time. It rules form, structure, focus, discipline, responsibility, steadfastness, security or insecurity, modesty, harvest, bitterness, depression, success or lack of it, and rigidity."
Therefore, a person's Saturn return is said to coincide with a deep questioning of one's path in life.

I think back to when I turned 29.5...hm, if I'm going to be precise about it, that would be November 2, 2007. What was going on in my life then? I had certainly recently made some changes for the better. I had left a bad relationship and moved into my own apartment. I was also about to make some more changes that indicated progress...I was about to start performing regularly at open mics, and I was finishing up a memoir project I had started that Fall in an essay writing workshop. I was also busy revisiting and re-evaluating parts of my past.

And now...I find myself caught in confusion and sometimes depression and sometimes fear, but mostly hope and excitement for the future. It feels like big changes are coming, but only if I make them so. I hope I have the necessary strength and courage to move forward. I think I do.