I can't make this stuff up.

I just poured myself a drink and turned on the TV for some pre-sleep brain numbing, and I came across an amusing infomercial hosted by Graham Russell and Russell Hitchcock of Air Supply. I thought, "this is going to be amusing," and it was - it was the Time-Life ad for their Classic Soft Rock Collection. 168 Hits! Yes! A real score for late night brain melt!

Time-Life infomercials are made for the wee hours of the morning. They're made for folks who are hanging out too late in front of the television, getting sleepy, possibly drunk, maybe lonely, probably stoned. The Time-Life folks aren't dummies - they know this demographic is the most primed to pick up the phone and pull out the credit card.

And then there are people like myself, who watch these infomercials for pure entertainment. Over and over I got to hear clips of Kenny Loggins, America, Chicago, Boz Scaggs, Christopher Cross, James Taylor, Linda Ronstadt, 10CC, and more...not to mention watch clips of Elton John's "Daniel" and Rod Stewart's "Maggie May" over and over and over...
Check out these quotable gems:

"Some people like a fine wine, others reach for a cold beer, but in 1979, everyone wanted a Piña Colada..."
"Soft rock takes me to a relaxing place, like a beach..."
"This is the music that made soft rock pure magic!"
"You'll find yourself singing along to songs you didn't know you knew all the words to!"
"You could spend hundreds of dollars trying to buy all the songs found on this collection" (um, iTunes anyone? 168 songs x 99cents per song...hmm...)
"There were so many songs from my high school times, and those were truly the greatest years of my life..." (Oof.)
"In the eighties, some artists put away their guitars, and plugged in their synthesizers." (Yeah, baby!)
"Every time I hear these songs, I feel like I'm on vacation." "You're so right, Angela."

A few other notes and highlights:
1) An acoustic "All Out of Love" by Air Supply, performed live on set by Graham and Russell, pitcher of lemonade on the table in front of them. Ah, so relaxing!
2) The video for "Sad Eyes," by Robert John - Did sexy used to equal a balding guy in a track suit? Is this the sexy that Justin Timberlake promises to bring back? Awesome!
3) Eric Carmen's "All By Myself"- I never noticed the physical resemblance to Prince before...am I crazy here?
4) I still don't understand Meat Loaf.

The soft rock is now floating in my head, along with my delicious nightcap...I can't wait for the dreams ahead...